FOSTERING TIES THAT BIND

Pallavi Pinakin provides useful insights into developing healthy attitudes

Considering the number of hours most of us spend in the workplace every day, positive working relationships play a vital role in our level of job satisfaction – not to mention the quality of our lives. They also have a direct impact on career success and growth.

Those who have a knack for building effective interpersonal equations with coworkers are valued as team members, better at meeting their professional goals and more likely to be promoted. On the other hand, those whose people skills lag behind their technical proficiency are slower to advance in their careers.

Fortunately, even if you don’t have that enviable natural talent for getting along famously with your colleagues, it’s a capability that can be developed and sharpened with practice. Keep in mind that professional relationships are tricky because we tend to see them as primarily transactional in nature.

Whether one is collaborating or competing, the natural tendency is to focus more on the outcome rather than the engagement itself. The goal is to add a relational component to this equation so that it’s not simply a means to an end – because you care not only about the result but also the person and your quality of interaction.

Here are some recommendations to help you cultivate stronger and more positive relationships at work…

BE APPRECIATIVE Take a few moments to think about coworkers who help you do your work better, offer valuable professional guidance or simply brighten your day. When was the last time you said ‘thank you’ to them?

Set aside some time later in your workday to write short notes of appreciation to these colleagues. Specific heartfelt expressions of gratitude are
one of the most powerful binding forces in the workplace.

Yes, you might feel a little shy and awkward at first but that’s only because you’re not used to showing your appreciation. Since this shouldn’t be a one-off exercise, make it a point to express your thanks at key moments such as the end of a critical project or after meeting an ambitious target.

DON’T COMPLAIN If there’s one type of person who is uniformly disliked in the workplace, it’s the gossiper cum complainer. Consider how you talk about your coworkers when they’re not in the room. Do you highlight their positive qualities or criticise them harshly by bringing up their weaknesses and passing unsavoury rumours?

If you’re constantly griping about everyone, your coworkers will assume you talk the same way about them behind their backs – and who can trust someone like that? Cultivate a habit of focussing on the positive aspects of your colleagues when speaking about them. Supportive team members are considered an asset by everyone.

BUILD ALLIANCES An excellent way to grow your tribe at work is to invite people to get involved with a project or initiative that you’re spearheading. Don’t simply ask people to join everything you’re working on – instead, pay attention to each person’s strengths and interests, and request their participation accordingly.


DON’T RIDICULE If you have a problem with anyone or have noticed a mistake in their work, discuss it directly with the person as a first step. Don’t raise the issue for the first time at a public forum like a team meeting or over the group email. This sort of blindsiding makes you appear manipulative and untrustworthy.

SHARE CREDIT Do you have that bad habit of shouting ‘me, me!’ when something is right and pointing fingers at others whenever things go wrong? Your competitive instincts can drive you to hog the credit, which might work in the short term but is likely to backfire in the long run.

None of your coworkers will want to collaborate with you if you’re unwilling to acknowledge their contributions but are quick to dole out blame. If you’re a manager, your team members will stop bringing you their best ideas if you keep appropriating them as your own.

So make it a point to recognise and highlight other people’s contributions to success. In the case of failure, focus more on what went wrong and how to fix it rather than trying to pin the blame on someone. This generosity of spirit will go a long way towards strengthening your relationships with coworkers.

BE RESPECTFUL There’s never a good time to shout, use sarcasm or hurtful words in the workplace. This type of communication sends a loud and clear message to your coworkers that you don’t respect them, or consider them worthy of your courtesy and kindness.

The foundation for any positive work relationship is respect, which must be fostered through effective and compassionate communication. This doesn’t mean burying your true feelings. If you want to express your anger or disappointment, simply find more appropriate and constructive ways to do so.